Fireworks

its been awhile. i know. ive been wanting and trying, but it hasnt come. you see, i have a block, and the thing about a block is, it takes time. its part of the natural process. its part of the cycle. so, i didnt push it. ive waited. ive collected. ive written in other ways. but ive been itching. saving every little scrap and catchy line and couplet. its rough, waiting for the flood, but it seems as though there is some hope. thats how it happens. out of no where, and its not that i think im out of the woods yet but its a start. just a flash. thats what this piece is, just a flash that i rode. completely from the hip, no real editing besides sentence and line breaks. i didnt nit pick this one. i didnt foot or meter or rhyme scheme it. i just let it be, and, i like it. its personal. its raw. just a stream of thought as best i could get it out. its the result of thinking a lot about how and why i write. im definitely trying to channel a bit of other styles. i want to broaden my scope of writing. i hope you like it, and if you dont, too bad, im gonna ride this one as long as i can. time to go exploring. criticism appreciated.

I saw some fireworks

tonight.

I first spotted them

from my window,

bursting and

raining down

color above the buildings.

 

They were echoing

down the streets.

Sounds chasing

after the lights they matched,

booming off every building.

 

I rushed out

to see them.

Rushed out

to you.

Half expecting you there,

head tilted back

staring up

at the sky,

beaming like a child.

The colors

washing

over your face,

over your smile.

 

I always enjoyed

watching

you do

or see or

hear something you liked.

There was such

an innocence that

shinned through.

Something

that pushed

aside the bad that had

been done to you.

Something that burst

out of you,

through

the scars and

damaged tissue,

out from that

heavy heavy heart.

 

I miss it.

It was like watching

someone be reborn

again and again. And I knew.

I knew it was why

I love you.

Because you have life

in you.

And now, I just miss it.

Because I only get to remember.

Because I am a fool.

Someone you

breathed life into.

 

So now, I see nothing.

I remember,

I talk of it

as if it were so long ago.

A different place.

A different age.

 

No longer a

warm devious smile.

No embrace.

No fights.

No walks,

or talks.

No making

Love. Sweet

and slow and passionate.

No fucking.

Raw

and dirty,

tied to the radiator

red assed.

No fucking fireworks.

 

Because already

I am not the person

that lived

there.

Lived then.

 

That man

is dead.

That man is empty.

That man is alone.

That man is

a memory.

That man is cold.

 

Fucking

fireworks.

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